National Caregiver’s Month: The “Mom Drive”

Flossie and the Fox – Photo Peggy Sue McRae

November is National Caregiver’s Month. In appreciation of caregivers The Mullis Center will host a Caregiver Appreciation Tea, November 23 from 12:00 noon- 1:00 pm in the Mullis Center library.

As anyone who has done it knows, caring for a loved one can be deeply challenging and at the same time deeply rewarding. When my sisters and I realized that our Mom could no longer safely live by herself we moved her into Friday Harbor’s Village at the Harbour assisted living community. As the sister living on the island I was the one who checked in on her, took her to appointments, watched Mariners games with her and eventually, when she needed 24 hour care headed up a small team to look after her. Now that she is gone I deeply cherish that time we had together.

What I’d like to share with you today is one thing that my Mom and I always enjoyed. At least once a week, as a reward after doctor appointments, if it was a nice day, or even if I just wanted to cheer myself up, I’d go get my Mom and take a drive around the Island to visit our favorite spots. I came to call this “the Mom drive”.

Here is the route: First, we would head out of town taking Cattle Point road all the way past the Cattle Point lighthouse to the concrete interpretive center. There we might get out and stretch our legs, or on a stormy day watch the crashing waves. We’d turn around there and head back taking in that incredible view of South Beach from above.

Sometimes we stopped at South Beach or we would continue on taking a left on False Bay Drive. I remember one grey February day when we were eagerly looking for signs of spring I slammed on the brakes as we turned on to False Bay Drive because there right past the corner I saw a bed of bright purple “Crocuses!”

At the pull off above False Bay there is a stone bench. Even on a cold day if the sun has been out that stone warms up and is lovely to sit on. Most often we would enjoy the view and then head toward Bailer Hill Road. If it was meal time at the Village we would turn right and head back into town but if we were still into the drive we would take a left and follow Bailer Hill out to the glorious west side. Driving along the west side we always looked for whales but very rarely saw them. We always looked for the waterfall in that little jungle like nook above Deadman’s Bay. At Whale Watch Park we would head up hill and take the West Side Road then Mitchell Bay Road, head right onto West Valley Road and then come back into town by way of Beaverton Valley enjoying the bucolic farmland.

In some ways I had it easy with my Mom. She was losing her memory but she never lost her sense of humor or her appreciation of beauty. I came to believe that it didn’t matter if she didn’t remember she’d just been on a drive. I think there is something about natural beauty that you absorb through your skin and that does not require a cognitive thought process. My Mom is gone now but these drives remain some of my own dearest memories of that special time we spent together.

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